Shaurya turns one!

With all the stuff happening around, I realize that I forgot to document a very important milestone that we achieved. On Oct 11, Shaurya turned 1 and we also celebrated 1 year of parenthood :-) My baby is growing up so fast… his age no longer being counted in months alone. I had been planning a lot for this milestone and was super excited.. About a month earlier, I along with my sister had already started preparing the guest list, thinking about return gifts, menu for the dinner, theme for the decoration, cake, et all. In general I was making a lot of fuss and driving M mad. :-D With both of us working and not getting too much time during normal weekdays, we used to tell M that we do not have a month; just 8 days in hand. But ignoring all my planning and preaching, M joined the bandwagon only 10 calendar days before the D day!! 

The first thing we finalized is the guest list. We live in a close-knit residential society where most of the families know each other. With many society functions taking place, everyone interacts with everyone else. Also with M being the society treasurer and member of the society council, we interact often with other society members. After Shaurya was born, we had a big function back home in Orissa. This was our chance for a celebration with our friends who are in Pune. We didn’t want to miss out on any of our close office friends too, so the list turned out to be a pretty long one! :-) While making the guest list, we also listed down who all has kids along with their approx. age to help us plan for the return gift. And then we grouped the kids based on their age. For example, for kids below 1 year, we got rattles and toys. For older kids, we wanted to give something that would (hopefully) instill a good habit in them.. so we got them piggy banks. There were also whistles, chocolates, balloons and pencil box set which was put inside the piggy bank. We bought everything about a week earlier and gift wrapped it over the weekend. I had made an invitation card with a format I got online. After making changes to it, we got it printed. The weekend before his birthday, we went to the houses of our guests and personally invited them along with the card. It was also e-mailed to our friends and colleagues. 

For the party venue, we had zeroed in on our society club. It has a garden and children’s play area in front and has a big hall plus separate spaces available where caterers can cook as well as a place to lay the buffet. We also started looking for caterers who can take care of the food. While searching for one, we got a party planner who stays nearby. She had started her business just 9-10 months back. She is a young mother who about a year back was looking for a caterer for her son’s birthday. On not finding a good choice, she organized the event herself. Did some for her friends too and thus started her own business “Make my Party”. Both M and I liked the plan that she had in mind and we finalized her. We took a themed decoration package also from her. The decoration was really nice.. with lot of big cardboard cut outs of cars, trains, ships, etc. We knew Shaurya isn’t big enough to enjoy it to the fullest. But he was also excited when he saw it all. And the other kids loved it too. For entertainment, M also got info of a magician and booked him for a magic show for the kids. 

But the million dollar question was what would Shaurya wear!! We wanted Shaurya to wear something comfortable. He would find himself among so many new people and that too past his normal sleeping time, we did not want to compound it by making him wear any traditional jari-tissue waala uncomfortable wear. Though many people including my sister said we should get something special.. like a kurta pyjama, dhoti types, M was in favour of comfortable and more practical Jeans and T-shirt. And kids look smart in it too! So we finalized on it. 

For Shaurya to be fresh for the party, we needed him to be well fed and having a rested sleep. I was just hoping that he sleeps in the evening and luckily, he slept at 5.30 pm. Had a good 1 hour nap and woke up all fresh. After having his dinner, he was all set for the party. If he is not sleepy or hungry, he is in full-on masti mood which is good for him as well as us and the guests!! :-)

Since it was a weekday and we had lot of small kids in our guest list, we had planned to start the party at 7pm. However by the time everyone started trickling in, it was already 8. First we had the magic show. The magician was really good.. very entertaining fella who interacted a lot with the guests and kept them engaged. The 45 min show was over in a jiffy. We had the cake cutting soon after. Shaurya was enjoying all the attention that he was getting. When the cake got cut, the party popper was popped!(?) As soon as it burst there was confetti everywhere. Shuarya was more interested in watching it fall rather than cutting the cake. :-D. Once the cake was cut, there was this huge sea of people who came with all sort of gifts. (This is something that I regret to this day.. we should have asked our guests to come without gift or at least given some other option to them… maybe requested them to contribute to a charity.. or get pencil, pen, notebooks, etc that can be donated. We have a whole lot of toys and other stuff in our home now.. Shaurya is not going to use most of it..! ) Anyways, coming back to the post, once the cake cutting was done, our guests proceeded to the buffet area. The starters were served during the magic show itself. And the main course was arranged as a buffet. The food was awesome. And I am not saying it just cause we were the hosts. Many of our guests came over to us to specially compliment on the food. Even to this day, many ppl in our society call and ask for the caterers number. I and M were mainly busy with the guest, greeting them, making sure no one feels alone or unattended, making sure everyone is enjoying, seeing off guests, etc. By the time the last guests left, it was midnight. 

Overall it was a successful party. Majority of the guests that we had invited turned up and most seemed to enjoy themselves! But for me, the highlight of the day was Shaurya. I was so proud of him. He was a good kid who did not cry or get cranky a lot. He cried once during the magic show when everyone was inside the hall and it got a little crowded. He was also running away if someone was trying to hold him. (as such also Shaurya doesn’t like being held by strangers.. even we carry him very less.. he likes roaming on his own 2 feet!! :-) ) But all and all, he was a very good kid, who was happily awake till 12 without crying. Ate everything that we were feeding him without any complaints. Played with my sister and her friends. I was indeed a very proud, happy and relieved mother!

 

 The b'de Invite

 Shaurya looking at the confetti as we cut the cake!! 

Delegating Parenting

Recently I have come across a lot of cases wherein young working couples leave their small / infant kids with their parents/in-laws while they work in a different city / country / continent. Earlier when I used to hear such cases, it was mostly the case with someone I didn't know closely. Learning about such cases from my friends/acquaintances who were telling this about someone else. At that time, I used to feel sorry for the innocent kid as well as the parents and thought maybe they have some financial constraints forcing them to leave separately from the kid. No one wants to leave his/her kid with others.. they must have done so with a heavy heart and had some really compelling reasons for the same. So as you see my empathy was with the parents. 

Now I see some people that I know who are doing the same. Of course most of my peers are working professionals like me and being in the same age group, many of them have small kids too. So it increases the probability that this time around I might actually know such people. However now that we are in the same boat, I am unable to see any justifiable reason for staying away from your kid. In most of the cases that I see, the couple is trying to safe up money for the child’s future. So here is the child in India while both of them have gone onshore leaving as small as a 1 year old behind. :-( I find financial constraint the most lousy reason. You can still save a reasonable amount if just the father or the mother goes onsite to a different country. One of the parent can stay with the kid and work from here. Put the baby in crèche or get a full time help or get your parents / in-laws with whom you were anyways planning to leave the kid. I am sure there is some better alternative than leaving such a small kid behind. What would that kid be feeling!! When it’s time for me to come back from office, I find Shaurya eagerly waiting for me; I avoid being late by even 15 min as it will increase his waiting. When he is sick, he doesn't even want to get down from my lap. He just lies on my lap while I rock him to sleep. I put him on bed only when he is asleep.(I am not sure if I do that reassure him or me but this is what happens). 

A child needs a parent far more than just for taking care of his/her normal day to day chores. I strongly believe that the emotional support that a child gets from his/her parents cannot be provided by anyone else howsoever close. So when I see parents especially mothers leaving their kids for onsite opportunity / career / promotion, etc, I find it difficult to fathom. Most of the time, I have not seen any major financial constraints with such people. What I see is very very ‘Selfish’ parents. They would like to enjoy their work and time abroad and so here’s the kid making the sacrifice. People who are ambitious or have such financial burden or want to enjoy their time should not have planned their kids. They should wait for the time when their condition is stable and/or they are ready to be parents rather than delegating their responsibility to someone else. Even accidental pregnancy gives u time to plan for the future! This is not a judgement that I am trying to pass, it is a statement of fact. The last thing you want to be as a parent is ‘Selfish’. 

Being a working mother, it has been difficult for me leaving my son at home. Even though I have my sister at home and a help (who has been working at my parent’s place since some 15 odd years and treats us like family), I still worry a lot on whether it’s going to have an adverse effect on Shaurya. Even on a normal day, I hate the part when I have to say bye to him when I start for office. It’s been more than 5 months now since I have joined office but I am still not used to it. Leaving him is still as difficult for me as it was the first day. Hopefully he won’t be a silent kid or a kid who is too mature or understanding for his age or God forbid an angry or violent kid.. at least not because he missed his mom or because I am not with him all the time. Both M and I take utmost care and are always vigilant in this respect. We are cautious not to show our silent guilt or any such negative emotion either. We do not want to pamper him too much or too less. Be too accommodating to adjust for our lost time together or be too strict just to be super cautious. Being a parent is a huge & difficult responsibility and something that no one wants to fail at. Keeping our worries at bay, we like many others just try to give it our best shot and hope that things turn out fine! Delegating such an important task can have its own repercussions

The 'Idiot' Box

A few days ago I saw an ad on TV which really rattled me and was disturbing to say the least. I was watching “Colors” channel and during the break, there was an ad for a new “Crime-related” show that will be telecasted from Dec. In the ad, a peek into one of the stories was being given.. it goes something like this.. there's a mentally unstable husband who kills his wife first and then keeps her dead body in the refrigerator... for 5 years!! Its gory just to listen to it and even write about it… u can very well imagine how gory it would be actually seeing this on television. I am fine with the channel showing the serial  (if it’s showed late in the night after prime time hours).. Now a days all these kind of suspense / crime / ghost /spirits related serials are back in fashion. There's at least one showing in each channel. But at least while creating advertisements for these kind of shows, people should think a little.

The ads are shown at any time of the day and an unsuspecting kid may happen to watch it. Young kids are impressionable (for that matter even adults are). We cannot even begin to imagine what kind of impact it can have on them. Being a mother to a young kid, I was really appalled on seeing the ad. (I have to admit here that I might not have reacted in such a strong way if I wasn't a mother myself but who knows.. maybe my reaction would have been similar). My son is small now and doesn't understand all these. He doesn't even watch TV unless there’s a song playing. He absolutely loves music. His current favourite being ‘

Go Go Go Govinda’ from ‘OMG’. He even wakes up from sleep if he hears this song. :D . But as Shaurya grows up and starts watching TV.. one day he maybe watching his favorite music show or cartoon show and there’s a break in between and he gets exposed to an ad like above.. :-(

In the ad, they could have just said all the gory details in voice overs instead of showing the dead body inside the fridge. I know the purpose of the ad was to have as much impact as it can and entice ppl to watch the show. And of course they have succeeded in it.. at least they have my attention. I know the ad / show makers are just looking for themselves and doing their job.. but here's when the TV censorship board comes into picture. Most of the time, they are busy censoring stupid stuff like not allowing a film to be broadcast because of adult content and this and that. Arre.. a parent knows when a particular film/show will be aired and if it is suitable for kids or not, he/she will ensure that the kids do not watch that film if its unsuitable. Instead of fussing about the obvious things, the board should focus on subtle things like these kind of ads which are difficult for a parent to control and have a greater impact. People might say this is unnecessary censorship & curtailing the freedom of artistic/creative expression but if you are creative, I am sure there is a better way to create ads/programs and still have the desired maximum impact!

Television content now has changed so much. It reflects on our choices and the kind of people we have become.  The Idiot box as its often called is working to match its name. :-( There’s N number of saas-bahu soap operas on TV. These kind of programs have an impact on our subconscious. We see scheming mother in law / daughter in law / sister in law etc.. this impacts the way we also think of our relationships. A small tiff which should ideally go unnoticed might make us think too much and blow it all out of proportion, changing the way we interact with our relatives. I never used to think about it.. but M made me realize it. He doesn’t like it if I watch a serial like this. He just brainwashes me against that programme.. J (Though I have never been that much into serials, I was a regular viewer of some shows in the past. The only serial I watch now is ‘ballika bahu’..I know it’s also a flawed one.. I used to watch it earlier then stopped it midway. However I have started watching it again ever since the character of ‘Shivraj Shekar’ has entered. Such a handsome fella!! :D… M will not be able to make me stop it.. at least for now ;-)) Majority of TV time in our household is taken up by Fox Traveller, NDTV Goodtimes, Times Now, SAB TV or some news/movie/music channel. And I am totally happy with it. We want our son to be exposed to such choices.. maybe with the addition of Discovery, Nat Geo and a few select cartoon channels. This is what we would like.. as they say 'parent' proposes, 'kids' disposes... :-D

Ganesh Puja Celebration with the kiddo!!

First things First.. wish you a very happy Ganesh Chaturthi!! J. Since I was a kid, I have always remembered bringing the Ganesha idol home for the 10 day celebration that goes on during this time. It used to be really fun filled days when we used to go to our ancestral home in the nearby village. There used to be daily morning and evening Aarti, evening kirtans, playing in our farmhouse, playing in the quaint little railway station in front of our home, catching dragonflys and the likes.. J After my marriage, I and M decided to continue this tradition too. With God’s grace, things have always fallen in place and we have been able to welcome Ganapati in our home each year. This year, it has been an even more special Ganapati Puja. This is the first one after Shaurya’s birth.. Puja celebrations with my own littlebal ganapati.. :-D

I was really looking forward to this since last month. I wanted to see how Shaurya will react when he sees the idol, will he allow us to do the decorations, will the decorations and lightings remain intact till end of the puja, how will he take to the morning and evening Aartis, etc. It has turned out pretty well till now. On Tuesday night, when we were doing the decorations, he was running here and there, happily getting himself wrapped in the decoration items and just enjoying all the fuss. J We had to keep the decorations very simple this year.. everything was pushed on to the wall and we have tried to keep as many things off limit for him as we could. And seeing all our excitement, Shaurya was also happy and excited when he saw the Idol. For the first 2 days he used to try to get the lights out or remove some of the things, but now he has got used to the idea. He enjoys the daily Aartis too.. M while doing the aarti holds the aarti thali with Shaurya and both of them together do a nice 360 degree turn.. praying the Lord in all directions.. :-D. Shaurya loves this.. as soon as I light the diya on the thali, he just stands in front and eagerly waits for M to do that little 360 degree turn with him.

The Little Devil 

On the day of Ganesh Chaturthi, I had made a rangoli just outside our front door. Since it was auspicious to start the Puja in between 6-9 am in the morning, we did the Puja as soon as we had bathed and were ready. By the time Puja was over and we were done with our breakfast, it was late. So the Rangoli was made only around noon. After making it, I sat in the drawing room and was chatting with M and my sister Chinki. We have this huge Sofa in our drawing room and we were lounging on it. Shaurya as usual was running all over the house looking for new things to play with. After some time, he went near the front door and stood there. I just peeped to check on what he was doing. I could see him bowing his head & looking at the Rangoli. He was standing just inside the door and was looking down at the Rangoli. We thought that he is finding all those rangoli colors attractive and new and thus was happily looking at it.. a little in awe maybe. How wrong could we have been? When he was standing there for about 3-4 minutes and continuously looking at theRangoli, I got a little worried. He doesn’t sit still in place for more than 30 seconds.. 3-4 minutes is too much. He can’t be that much in Awe of the colors.. something wasn’t right. When I went to him, what do I see? He had this belan (rolling pin) in one hand (don’t know when he went to the kitchen and pulled it from the countertop), was holding on to the door frame with his other hand and was happily scribbling at the rangoli with the belan. All my efforts of the last 20 minutes went kaput.. the rangoli didn’t even survive 30 minutes. L And he wasn’t done just yet. I got this rangoli frame from my neighbor and had made ganesha with it on a plate. I had kept it in front of the Ganesha Idol. In the evening, Shaurya just went near the Idol. Gave this plate a slight shake.. just a light tap and then left, never to touch it again. However this small tap was just enough to mix all the colors together. L At least this rangoli survived till evening. J

My Desi Boy

As part of our society Ganesh Puja celebrations, there were many different events planned to keep the society members involved and make it fun for all. One such event was the fancy dress competition for children below 2 years of age. Shaurya being 11 months was eligible for the same. It was a working day for me.. since I am normally back by 4pm, I planned to buy an outfit for Shaurya and get him ready for this event which was scheduled for 7pm. It turned out to be a busy day @ office, my sister called me at 6 and reminded about the event. By the time I reached home it was already 6.30pm, I went to a few shops near our home but did not get any fancy dress outfit. I started discussing with M and my sister on what to do now. I realized that Shaurya has a white Dhoti Kurta that he wore for a Puja ceremony. We got him to wear this white dhoti kurta. My sister took out one of my red dupattas and tied it around Sharuya’s waist. M suggested we make a moustache on Shaurya’s face. Out came my never-before-used Kajal :-D and I made a moustache.  A big red tikka using my lipstick and Shaurya was ready for the event. To complete his desi boy look, we gave him a white stick - improvised out of a curtain holder. Shaurya was looking very very cute. When we took him downstairs for the event, everyone was super excited on seeing Shaurya. Everyone was Oohing and Aaahing..  :D. All the other kids were dressed beautifully too. There were 2 little krishnas; both looking great. And our front door neighbor had made her daughter Radha.. she was looking so pretty!! It was nice seeing such small kids dressed up for the event. All of the kids were given a gift by M (our society treasurer and working committee member :D). You can call me a biased mother but I have to admit I found Shaurya the cutest of them all and ready as a perfect fancy dress participant J.

Trip to the Movie Theatre

Since Shaurya’s birth we have not gone to watch movie in a theatre. We have had ample opportunities to go to theatre. I have a full time maid at home and my sister also stays with us, so we could leave Shaurya with them and go for a movie together. However both M and I never felt it worth so much that we need to leave Shaurya behind. We did not want to take him to the theatre since there would be loud sounds in the movie and Shaurya is too small for all the noise. With Shaurya turning 1 next month, we decided to give it a try and see how he takes to it. Luckily for us, Barfi had just released. It’s a soft light movie so we were sure there would be no loud action sequences or sound in it. We booked the 11.30 am show so that Shaurya will be ready by his normal time and play a little. He usually sleeps by 12 pm so maybe 30-45 min into the movie, he can doze off on my lap. We reached the theatre by 11.10, Shaurya as usual was excited on seeing a new place. Everything was okay till we entered the hall. Shaurya was looking at the big screen and at everyone around. Then the lights were turned off J This may be triggered sleep hormones inside him, he started getting a little cranky. I gave him a biscuit to eat, let him sip little water and rocked him a little. The movie had soft melodious background score. When the first song started, I gently eased Shaurya into a sleeping position with his head in the nook of my arm. In 30 seconds flat, he was asleep listening to the soft tones. He never ever sleeps so easily. Maybe I should buy a songs DVD of Barfi :-D He woke up only towards the end of the movie. It was a great experience and not as dreadful as were thinking. We had gone mentally prepared to leave the movie in between and come back home if our son is not comfortable. Thankfully everything turned out to be good. My friend Amu calls it beginner’s luck.. :D hope it turns out to be more than that. Any which way, we were thankful for this dose of luck. J

Ganapati Idol @ our home

Doing the Aarti along with his Papa. 

Seen here happily and quietly ruining the Rangoli that I made.

In his Desi Boy avataar. :-)

Mommy back 2 work

Finally I have joined back office. After taking 8 months of leave through various extensions, I had to decide on when to join back. This definitely has to be the most difficult decisions I have had to make. There were so many things going on in my mind, so many discussions I have had with M, so many pros and cons we discussed..  

We were very clear that my joining back should never be at our son’s expense. We did not want him to be sad and unhappy. I have heard from many of my friends that it’s generally the guilt of the working mom that comes out and makes her think in that direction. Small kids do not miss or think so much. They adapt really well. So if you join back and are confident about how you manage, your kid will get that vibe and adapt well. If you are in doubts, this vibe will also reach your kid and he/ she will have trouble adapting to things. So we are trying to provide positive vibes even though we sometimes have our doubts.

Our main concern was how our son will take to my joining back office and being away from him for long durations. There have been times when I have left him for 3-4 hours but never more than that.  To handle this, we decided that initially I would go to office for 6 hrs or so and gradually increase it. 

Shaurya will be 8 months old in a week. He is a happy baby (most of the time.. :-) Touchwood!! ) who keeps crawling all around the house and playing with this or that, turning the house upside down. He finds something or the other to keep himself occupied.. so it’s not difficult entertaining him but u have to keep a constant watch on him. Otherwise he would go and start eating the doormat.. you see that is what he finds most attractive in our house!! Followed by potato sacks in the kitchen, head phone wires, laptops, pillows, strings coming out of blankets, etc. He has also started to test his walking skills, so he keeps standing, trying to balance, falling over on his head, bum, etc etc. So we have to be vigilant in that respect too.

I wasn’t that worried about what he will eat during my absence since I had already started him on semi-solid diet and during day time, he generally eats either porridge or mashed fruits or formula milk etc. The only big task here is feeding him. :-) It takes me nearly 30 min to an hour to feed him one meal. And he has to be continuously entertained during that whole time. :-D I have a full time maid at home who has been with Shaurya since he was 2 months old. She takes care of him well; only problem being she can’t spoon feed him. For the time being though this has been taken care of; my sister is with us and she takes care of spoon-feeding shaurya in my absence. 

He sleeps very less during the day time. And while preparing for joining back office, we slowly made sure that our maid is able to rock and put him to sleep and Shaurya is very comfortable with his Uma aunty :-). But then this is only during the day, come evening and I don’t know what happens to my baby. I have to be with him, otherwise he won’t sleep. If he wakes up in the middle of the night, and I don’t hold him within a few minutes he starts crying till I come and hold him. No matter who comes to him at that time, he won’t keep quiet for a long time. Kids are weird when it comes to sleep.. :-) I and Amu laugh a lot when we talk about our kids sleep patterns. If they are hungry, they cry.. its understandable since they can't feed themselves. But if you are sleepy, just sleep naa.. who is asking you to be awake and cry your heart out!!

It’s been 2 weeks now since I joined office. Haven’t been able to clock full working hours yet. But it’s been manageable till now. I think the main reason being presence of my sister and our maid. My sister is awesome with kids and our maid has been with us for more than 14 years now (She works at my parents’ house, I have requested her to come with us for a few months :-)) She is very caring and has great sense of responsibility.  Shaurya has been with them since long now and nearly as comfortable with them as me. So I guess for him, it’s like “Mom & Dad are out for a few hours but I have my mausi and uma aunty so no worries!!.. I will have fun in their absence!!” :-) Presence of my sister has helped reduce the guilt I have felt leaving Shaurya and joining back office.  It’s not that I am guilt free now but the guilt has reduced considerably. I still have pangs of guilt but I am in a position to try to happily look at the positives. 

This is how things are for now..  I know it is not permanent. Situation will change, things will evolve but my baby will also be growing up and I am hoping he will also keep adapting along with his parents.

First step into motherhood

It's been quite long since I posted something. I know it's nothing new :D Everyone especially me is quite aware how lazy I am. I wanted to make some excuse for the same but than I got to be truthful to myself. Anyways I was talking to my friend Amu and she pointed out that it’s high time I wrote something. So here I am, dragging myself out of my laziness and trying to scribble something. And following her lead, let me begin by recording my ‘Deliverance’ ;-D

First things first.. as the title of this post already suggests: I am a 'MOM' now.. :-D. Gave birth to a beautiful little angel on 11th Oct 2011. We have named him 'Shaurya'. During my entire pregnancy, I & M were looking forward to welcoming a cute little girl to begin our family.. but guess 'Shaurya' had already picked us up as his parents and we can't be grateful enough. (Btw now I know that he used to practice kickboxing when we used to address my ever growing belly as 'she' :)) Some things are just meant to be. While pregnant, I used to fret about having normal delivery. Nearly most of everyone that I knew had C-sec and I so wanted a normal one even though I have a very low pain threshold.. ironical..huh!! ;-)

I had no pain or even the slightest or smallest of contraction during my entire pregnancy. One day before my due date, we went for a ultrasound. It was found that I had low water content in my uterus. My Gynaec advised us to go ahead for induced labor instead of waiting for natural labor to begin. My uncle who is a pediatrician gave us a heads up to be ready for a C-sec coz of the low water content. We went home assimilating all the info and to prepare for the next day. We retired into our room early to get some rest but neither I nor M were able to sleep. On the D day, we were out of bed early in the morning. I made poha for breakfast (M's favorite) and we (as in me, M, my mil and fil) started for the hospital. After some quick form filling, I was admitted and injected pain inducing medicines through saline drip. The Dr said it sometimes takes 3-4 hrs for pain to kick in so we waited, waited and waited. Till evening there was no progress and no pain of course :) !! . The doctor than tried few more medicines. Again nothing. By 8 pm the baby started showing some very minor signs of distress. We could have waited longer but than since even with help, my labor was not progressing and to top it the water content was low, chances of a normal delivery were very less. We didn’t want to push for a normal delivery, resulting in maybe an emergency C-sec and/or distress for the baby. After consulting with our doctor, around 8.30 pm, we gave a go ahead for C-sec. And as if on cue, it started raining heavily... filmy indeed!!

With the decision finally made, everything started moving in fast forward mode. A welcome break from the sheer monotony of waiting. I was moved into the operating theatre. It was my first time in an OT and what a place it was. Pretty awe-inspiring - Squeaky clean with quite a lot of high end gadgets and monitors. I would have loved the place only if it was not me going under the knife. There was an OT table where I was to lie. It was very very thin and I wasn't sure how I supposed to fit in there in my normal form forget about 9 month pregnant form. Anyways somehow I tried to fit in. Once in, I was quickly attached to many of those cool monitors and the anesthetist and Gynaec started their work. I just felt slight tugging and pulling kind of sensations in my tummy and before I knew it my son was out. I was just shown the baby and then he was handed over to a pediatrician for check up. we had opted for stem cell banking so my Gynaec started working on it and then stitched me up. I was then wheeled into the recovery area. While all this was going on, I was craving to hold my baby and be with M.

Once the baby was checked and bathed, the nurse took him outside OT and handed him over to his father and grand parents. M was given hospital gown and he come to the recovery area to be with me. I will for ever remember that first look and all the love I saw on his face. It's priceless. It was past 12 now and he wished me 'Happy 34 months'. :-) (34 months of our wedding.. we got married on 12th Dec). After about an hour more there, I was wheeled into my room where I was welcomed by my beaming in-laws. After a 5 day stay, I was discharged from the hospital. I was so glad to be at home. A hospital no matter how luxurious is in the end still just a hospital!!

Shaurya is 6 months old or shall I say young now. Growing up pretty fast. It feels like it was just yesterday that he came into our lives. I have been in love with him from the moment I saw him. Motherhood has been quite a joy - not everything has been easy or as natural as it seems but it has been fun. I am also learning and growing as a mother along with my son. "A child gives birth to a mother" - this is a caption on display at OnP tulips (the hospital that I delivered in). True indeed!! :)