Kids & Percentages

Me: Howz your pain? Do you want to take the pain medicine?

Shaurya: Naah.. today, it has not been more than 18%

Me: 🙄

Last weekend, Shaurya fell while playing and has ligament damage on his left wrist. He is doing fine and recovering slowly. His response reminded me again of the funny ways in which he sometimes assigns totally random and seemingly accurate percentages to stuff. It's never 10% or 20% or 80%. It's 12.5% or 18%(like above) or 82%. 

Once I had tried to understand how he reaches these figures; he had a pretty logical reasoning. For example, he comes to 18 because it's more than 10 but less than 20. However it's tending more towards 20 - nearer to it and hence the number.

Kids I tell you; you learn something new everyday!! 😂

We will see

These are strange times that we are all in; with a focus on keeping ourselves and our loved ones safe from Corona. The lockdown has been a great opportunity; fun at the start, difficult in between but now we have all started accepting it as the new way of living. It's been even more challenging for parents of young kids - keeping them entertained while trying to keep them away from gadgets.

My 8 year old is having his regular school online since end of March. He is online from 9am to 2pm. Thankfully he has lot of breaks in between but it's still a lot of time in front of a laptop. After school hours are spent reading, playing with his board games, legos, etc. But with no more playtime with his friends, some more time is spent in front of screen - Netflix, Video calls with family back home in India and online game with his friends.

We try our best to reduce it and he tries his best to get more :-). So one day, he asked me if he could play one round of a game and then have video call with his mausis (my sisters) in the evening. I told him we will see later. He immediately started quoting a scene from 'Pursuit of Happiness'. He told that in the movie, when the kid asked his father if they will go and watch the football match, his father told 'We will see'. Then the kid told 'That means No'.  I told my son it's a movie, then he threw back my own statement that it's based on real life. He went ahead and gave another example from the book 'Chronciles of Narnia' - when parents say 'We will see', it means never. ;-p

I have to say he's not exactly wrong! But M told him when your parents say 'We will see', it means we will discuss it later and agree with conditions. M to the rescue as always :-D

Done & Dusted.. And Super Happy!

On 10th March, I completed by first ever 10K Run in the Pune Womens Half Marathon. Yeaaaaaaa!! :-D As you can see, I feel super happy. 

In my earlier post, I had outlined a somewhat practical plan that I had put in place to prepare for it. Though to be honest, I could not stick to it to the T. The plan to increase my running sprints could not be achieved; in fact it reduced as I caught cough and even making 1-2 rounds made me have fits of cough.  But my walks were regular and I used to walk 4-5 kms at a stretch for at least 5 days a week. 

As the D day approached, I had my reservations but then my aim was just to complete it and hopefully have a decent time. I wanted to avoid being the last one to cross the finish line :-) The reporting time was 5.45 am and flag off was at 6.45 am. We put 2 alarms - 1 for 4.45 am and 1 for 5.15 am to wake up and start from home respectively. Though we woke up as soon as the alarm rang - we realized it was 6 am. Both I & M had somehow missed the earlier 2 alarms and woke up later to another one set by M (for God only knows what!). We scrambled to get ready and reached the venue just on time. I reached the start line at 6.43 am.. phew!!! :-D

Since there were 3 different categories of event - 4K fun walk/run, 10K Run and 21K Half marathon, there were so many enthusiastic participants for the event. The energy level at the venue was amazing. Women and girls of all age groups, shapes and sizes had participated. There were a few mother (late 20s-early 30s) - daughter(6-8 yo) duo as well as few old ladies (in there 60s-70s). It was quite motivating to see a new mom participate and she completed her Run pushing her baby in a pram along with her. 

As soon as the run started at 6.45 am, I started with full josh as well. Started with a Run and then slowly once I tired, I started brisk walking. After a couple of minutes, I again started running. I did this intermittently till the Finish line. The venue as well as the stretch where we had to run was a beautiful road lined with lush green trees; the weather had a nice little early morning chill; at regular intervals, there were people cheering us on; and coupled with the spirit of the participants, it was a great experience!

M was so excited as I finished the run; he was waiting for me at the finish line.. ready with his phone camera :-D. I took 1hr 29 min to finish & feel quite ecstatic as my goal was to complete in 2 hrs. The sense of accomplishment I feel is frankly a little too high. :-p Can't wait to participate in more such events..... have too many changes going around right now and life's hectic but am so looking forward to taking it up again once everything settles down. Fingers crossed!

Khub Ladi Mardani..

Not really satisfied with the title of this post but can't really think of anything else.. Anyways here I begin.. So Shaurya's school - TAS had their annual concert on 26th Jan last month. This is the second annual concert of the school since he started Primary in here. Even last year the event was amazing and we were pleasantly surprised by the quality of the event and how the school management, teaching and non teaching staff handled everything. They actually give you a program schedule as you reach the venue :-D. The more I say about how great the school events are, the more I will miss... Let's just suffice it to say that it continues to improve year on year.

Program Schedule

This year, keeping in sync with the Republic day spirit, the theme was India's heroes. 4 Heroes from the annals of our history were shortlisted for different grades. I loved the performance of each & every grade. Though my son is in Grade 2 and their play was great as well, I absolutely loved the play of Rani Laxmi Bai by Grade 1.

It covered all the major aspects of Rani Laxmi Bai's life and the girls who acted out her character were brilliant. The dialogues were superb, the music hauntingly beautiful, the LED back-screens that were used to show the location of the various scenes were selected with great care and made you feel as if it was being played in that actual place. One of the things that I like best about any TAS event is the music. The music teacher - Savio Sir is amazing. In all the plays, at the end they have curtain call and then all the participating kids come on the stage together and sing a song based on the play. At the end of this play, they sang "Khub ladi Mardani... " The kids sang the entire song.. I have just put a few lyrics of the same below.

The play was so heart touching, I got overwhelmed in quite a few scenes.. believe it or not, I cried in those scenes. :-( And when the kids sang the "Khub ladi mardani" song at the end, tears were continuously streaming down by cheeks; I had to bite my fingers to ensure I don't start sobbing and hiccuping. I dread to imagine what the parents sitting behind and beside me thought of me. Good thing I didn't know them!! Grateful for small mercies ;-p

In a nutshell, a great play and even greater event that was done beautifully under the leadership of their Principal. Mrs Neerurkar Ma'am. (On a side note.. Shaurya says his principal ma'am walks like a Queen.. and she does; guess the effects of having a military family.)

On another side note... I am so looking forward to watching the movie Manikarnika over the weekend!

Aiming for My First 10K

On an impulse, I have registered for a 10 KM Walk/Run at Pune Womens Half Marathon 2019, though it will only be walking, no running for me ;-p. I registered at the end of Dec and at that time I was regular at my morning walks and thought setting a goal of this 10K event will be a good motivator. As it is scheduled in early March, it would give me some 8-9 weeks to prepare.

We had gone to our hometown in Odisha for December Holidays and after a good break of 3 weeks, I fell sick once back home in Pune. It took me a week to recover from viral flu, post which I caught a nasty ear infection. I had to start antibiotics for this and again it took me some own good time to bounce back to normal. 

So now with 4 weeks to the 10K event, I have started on my regular walks again. Though I will not be running, I have started short sprints of 1-2 mins of Slow Run aka Jog followed by 1-2 mins of walk. I do about 5 sets of these. And remaining time, I just concentrate on walking. My plan is to gradually increase the slow runs to 2-4 mins, with 1-2 mins of walk in between. I have not walked 10 km at a go yet, usually its a walk 3-4 kms at one go, but I hope to target to walk 5 km next week and then slowly increase it by another 2-3 kms in the next 2 weeks. I don't know if I should try & walk for 10 km before the event as well. Lets see, my training is evolving as I go. 

I want to be practical in my approach - just aim to complete the 10K event in a decent amount of time. On the D day, I want to complete it and not give up midway owing to fatigue. Wish me luck!

Our own BBC

Let me begin by clarifying that this post has nothing to do with 'The BBC'. Since as long as I remember, we have used the term 'BBC' to describe a person who cannot keep in any information or news and just broadcasts everything to each and everyone.

At our home, we have our very own BBC aka my son, Shaurya. With Shaurya, both M and I have a rule of not keeping any secrets or information hidden from him. If we are planning something which impacts us as a family, we share it with him and involve him in our excitement. In view of this, we tend to discuss things freely in front of him. M and I are careful not to talk about private stuff in front of him. However there have been few fun and few not so fun instances where Shaurya has announced stuff to all and sundry about the happenings in our life! '. 

In my last post, I mentioned about how he could not contain his excitement over M's birthday surprise and just blurted it out at the last moment. :-) Last year, we bought a bigger apartment in Pune and had plans to move in there this year. The day we booked the apartment, we were super excited and so was the kiddo. And he went ahead and told this to few of his friends (and their parents) in our current apartment society on the same day itself. So much for sharing this with our neighbours gradually. 

A not so fun instance happened in our recent trip to our home-state for the December holidays. M was driving my papa's new car and it got a little scratch on it from a motorbike. As haurya was also travelling in it when this happened, we told him to let M break the news to nanaji and not him. He agreed to it. We reached home and got out of the car; papa was standing in front of the shop. As soon as we got out, Shaurya starts with 'Papa, now tell Nanaji what happened!. Tell now! Tell! Tell!'. Though I felt bad for M & papa (for scratch in the brand new car), I immediately went inside the house before I burst out laughing. :-D

You would think that by now we would have learnt our lesson but guess we are late learners. In our professional life, we are getting a very good opportunity for which we may need to move out of India. Since this is a major change for us, we have been discussing the pros and cons of this. We asked Shaurya as well how he would like to move to a new place and kind of getting him to look up to the possible change. We should not have been surprised when one of our neighbour (parents of Shaurya's friend) asked us if we are moving to so and so country.

I guess we need to start working on telling him about the concept of 'family surprises' and keeping it a surprise till the 'right time. Will begin to start working on it ASAP.

PS: I can't believe..actually, you know what.. come to think of it, I CAN believe the last post I wrote was in Aug-17 and nothing since then! I just have one reader and she kept on encouraging me to write something. But being me, it just kind of skipped from my radar. And honestly 2018 just flew by! This post is for you Amu... :-); I will plan for some late posts from 2018.

Surprise Planning & Shaurya

So it was M’s birthday on 9th and I was working along with Shaurya for a surprise midnight celebration – it’s not exactly a surprise anymore though as we do it every year... maybe I can skip it one year and then it will truly be a surprise when nothing happens at midnight!! ;-p

On the evening before, I & Shaurya went out and bought a cake and flowers. Shaurya had already made a greeting card.. he made the card, decorated it with my help and wrote the birthday message himself and his gift to M was “200 kisses”. When we reached home, I kept the cake inside the fridge and hid the flowers, cards & our gift in Shaurya’s room. I had been telling Shaurya that it’s to be a surprise and we will celebrate the birthday at night. Frankly he has been doing pretty good in keeping the secret and I was pleasantly surprised when he didn’t tell M about his card or the Gift that I had ordered.

Since he was holding it all in really well, I was not at all prepared for what happened when M reached home. No sooner had M crossed the door, Shaurya jumped up, ran to the kitchen and covered the fridge with his arms yelling.. “Don’t look here.. there’s nothing inside”. We were so surprised that it took us a minute to realize what he said and then both I & M burst out laughing!! :-D He went on to uncover yet another surprise by running to his room, blocking the entrance and saying – “Don’t come inside this room either” :-)

In the end, I am just thankful that he held on to it for so long.. we had been planning for the gift (photobook and coupons) since 2 weeks and it was great that it did not reach M's ears till the last day. Shaurya was super excited on the last day and getting the cake just did it for him - he could not contain it within him anymore. A memorable uncovering of the surprise to be sure!

A 'Mad'enning word

Be careful of what you say in front of your kids.. they will come back to you at the most embarrassing of times. So we tell Shaurya not to use bad words when talking. “Paagal” (mad) is one such word. Kids use it to tell each other off when they either have a fight or think the other person is talking nonsense. We tell Shaurya not to use it at all.

This Saturday, he was playing cricket in the society park with 2 of his friends. One of his friend’s cousin (a teen of about 15) came there and joined them. So she was batting and one kid was bowling. During the course of the play, the teen girl used the word “Paagal”. Shaurya immediately told her not to use it as it’s a bad world. :-) The girl immediately said “Sorry”. Shaurya told “Its ok” and then to make her feel a little better he said “My mom and dad also say it sometimes….” And then went on to add “….to each other”.

The girl laughed out loud.. of course, after our initial shock, we joined in as well! :-D But then, it made us realize to be extra cautious when talking in front of him! Let's see how we fare ;-p

IPL cheers

So the IPL season is in full swing right now. Both I & M have not watched​ or followed IPLs in the past; this time around though we are watching it. Sanskar (our nephew) is a keen follower :-). If TV is on, Shaurya is more interested in watching cartoons than anything else. In order to get his buy in, we ask him to cheer for his team. And Shaurya has some very interesting reasons for supporting and cheering a team. Sample this...

In RCB vs RPS match, shaurya supports

- RCB as Virat Kohli plays in it (shaurya is a big Virat fan:-D)

- RPS as we live in Pune obviously. Another reason Dhoni plays here.

In MI vs RPS match, shaurya supports

- MI as the team has 'indian' in its name.

- RPS as mentioned above ;-)

In DD vs KXIP match, shaurya supports

- DD as Shaurya's mausi lives in Delhi

- KXIP as there's 'Rangla Punjab' restaurant in the commercial complex of our apartment ( don't ask)

In KKR vs GL match, shaurya supports

- KKR as it has 'knight riders' in its name and when his skating sir teaches him skates at 'night', he has lots of fun... :-D

Sorry GL & SRH,  for you Shaurya hasn't found any reason to support yet. For GL, maybe I can tell him that Modi is from Gujarat. Can't think of any reason for SRH that would sway him Not unless you manage to get Virat in the next season ;-p

Graduation Day!

Last week I attended the first “Graduation Day” function of my life.. that too for my 5 and half year old son  :-) (my first as I missed attending the graduation ceremony to get my engineering degree).  It’s funny how times have changed.. even finishing kindergarten is now termed as graduation. I and M were pleasantly surprised when we received the invite to attend the Graduation Day ceremony for our son who is finishing Sr.KG now.

The Graduation day event was very well planned. There were some cute solo performances from the kids – be it dance, songs, storytelling, music or speeches. At the end of it, the kids were made to wear Graduation gown, cap and were called out one by one to the dais. The class teacher gave each one a scroll and a sash. I especially loved the Sash – it had a picture of the kid and a name given to him/her rhyming with first letter of his/her name – Shaurya’s Sash read “Sincere Shaurya”. At the end of the event, the kids came together for a class photoshoot and gave a combined performance by singing a Graduation Song. Shaurya and his friends had lots of fun wearing the gowns and posing in it. The teachers ensured it was a memorable and special day for each.

It was a very touching ceremony and I am sure many parents got emotional. I was overwhelmed (and had to wipe my tears secretly least people think I have gone nuts watching the Kindergarten graduation ceremony of my son!! Dunno what I will do when he actually graduates ;-D).  But seriously.. more than the kids, this ceremony was for the parents.. to make them realize that their kids are growing.. and growing up fast.. with them entering a ‘little’ more serious phase of their life!

This is Shaurya’s last year with his pre-school Colours.  It’s a wonderful school and the teachers are absolutely brilliant. With love and care, the teachers have done a great job to nurture the natural curiosity that kids have – kids there know everything (and more) of what a kindergartner would know and still have varied interests and healthy curiosity. We just hope that the Primary school that we have chosen for Shaurya continues to help him grow and develop this way!

In the 'Graduation' attire :-)

Edited to Add: Shaurya thought this was Dracula costume and they were made to wear it for fun!  :-D

Diwali Preparations

As Diwali approaches, the usual preparations have begun! Starting with shopping of course :) Now both I and M don't like shopping and its the biggest biggest chore for us. With less than 4 days to go, its still not complete. This year we will not be able to go to our hometown in Odisha for Diwali celebrations. We are going to be in Pune and Shaurya will have his elder brother Sanskar to help in bursting crackers. (This will be the first Diwali that Sanskar will be away from bhaiya bhabhi, mummyji, papaji, dadi and Archi; I hope that he has fun and doesn't miss them too much! ). 

M and I are no longer into bursting crackers and had totally stopped it. However post Shaurya's birth, we usually get  a few so that he gets to enjoy this part of the festivity as well. Till last year, even Shaurya was happy with bursting few crackers on the main Diwali day. Everything changed last year, he has learnt the joy of bursting crackers. In our hometown, kids start bursting crackers a week before Diwali which continues till a week after Diwali. Shaurya had loads of fun last year bursting crackers at his maternal and paternal grandparents home. Even this year, he was looking forward to bursting crackers however last Friday he came home from school and told me that he has promised his ma'am that he will not be bursting crackers. Seems his class teachers have told the kids about Noise and Air pollution and how crackers are not good for our environment (Bless them!). Not sure if Shaurya will be strong enough to keep his promise... some moments he tells "I will not burst any".. and some moment he tells "I will burst only 3 - 1 chakri, 1 anar and 1 phuljhadi".. I guess his heart and mind are still fighting over it. Lets see what the kiddo finally does! :-) 

I generally start preparing sweets and savories 2 days before and do it each day post dinner. Now that I work 3 days a week, I am hoping to start it tomorrow when my weekend officially starts.. yayyyyyyyyy!! :-) All the men in my in-laws side are big time into sweets; Shaurya specially loves Gulab Jamun and this is something that I make even if I am not able to make anything else. So with my weekend beginning tomorrow and Diwali falling on Sunday, I have a super hectic long weekend planned. Along with all the cooking, I will also be taking out all the decoration items (candles, LED lights, torans,etc) from previous years. We will also be making trips to the local market to buy fresh ingredients and flowers, clay diyas, puja essentials & gold jewelry for Dhanteras. Even though the festival turns out to be super hectic, it has a beautiful madness to it. You remain in a 'happy' zone during this time. Looking forward to making Rangoli outside my home, lighting beautiful diyas and eating to my heart's content! Not to forget, bursting crackers with Shaurya, Sanskar & M :-)

Happy Diwali!

Kids and Gender equality

This post is a result of an incident involving my son that happened today evening.. We live in a small residential society where we are blessed in having majority of neighbours who are in similar boat as us - In their early to late thirties with one or two young kids/toddlers. This ensures that my 5 year old has lot of playmates. (Touchwood!) (Note - there are some cons as well but then what doesn't :-) ). Today evening he was playing with the daughter of my front door neighbour in their house; all well till it was just the 2 of them. Then one of her other girl friend joined in. After some time, my son came back home. Since its rare that he comes back on his own, I asked him what happened. It seems they told him you are a girl since he was playing with them (2 girls). This is not the first time it has happened and luckily this time he didn't come back crying (it has happened in the past when he was told to go play with boys!)

I get annoyed when I see kids not involving others of the opposite gender in their games. I am sure boys do the same and I am seeing my son learning to differentiate based on such experiences. As kids, boys and girls play in their own different ways and I have seen that by nature they make play groups based on their commonality. But they should be able to play as they want - In our society, I see 1 girl playing with 3 boys and she is not told to go play with the girls. But if it's 1 boy playing with 3 girls, he is told to go and play with the other boys - and I am not just talking about the kids telling each other here (kids are kids and their behavior is sometimes mean.. they fight, they cry and they forget & makeup), even we as parents support and unknowingly perpetuate this bias. Girls playing with cars doesn't raise eyebrows but boys playing with dolls does. A boy in a pink trouser is pointed at but not a girl in a blue dress. Equality should not be just about giving equal opportunity to girls, it should include boys too. I believe we need to move from gender equality to gender neutrality. Since the seed of bias is planted since childhood, it just grows slowly and steadily along with them. The repercussions of such bias by our earlier generation is already there for all of us to see.

In this era when we talk of equal pay and equal opportunity, we can't really wish away this inequality if we start to differentiate between boys and girls since childhood and tell them that they should things appropriate for their gender. Kids are like wet clay who get molded into adults based on what they learn from their surroundings; the little natural gender based difference that they have increases based on the gender based stereotype that they see around them. There are lots of boys more sensitive and caring than girls and lots of girls more successful and hard working than boys.. no one is better than the other,  Just different. We should just give them an open hand so that they can remain equal with their differences.  And we should avoid making boys the victim as we fight for equality of our girls! 

The Real 'Chipko' Movement

Few months back, M had told Shaurya a little bit about the 'Chipko Movement' - trying to instill a little social awareness and make him aware of the importance of Greenery in our life. ;-p So M told him about Suderlal Bahuguna being one of the pioneers of it and how he went about saving trees from being cut!

Today while I was playing with Shaurya, we were chatting and revising random stuff. He has been absent from school since 3 weeks now (We are in my hometown in Odisha on extended vacation and it will be few more weeks before he rejoins school) so I thought of doing a little revision of his A's & B's.

While talking, I asked about the Chipko Movement and this is how our conversation went;

Me: Who started the 'Chipko Movement'?

Shaurya : Sunder lal Bahuguna

Me: Right! And what did he do?

Shaurya : Bad uncles came and cut the trees. Good uncle then got glue and stickers and used it to stick the trees back. 

Me: Speechless!! 

Ofcourse, they had to stick them together if it was to be a real 'Chipko' movement! :-D

Happiness is..

.. turning in your bed in the middle of the night and as you turn, your kid opens his eyes, says 'I love you, Mumma' and then dozes off.

PS: Good to remember on a day when he is on your nerves ( like today ;-))

Year End Post

A fabulous year just ended. I can’t really believe that 2014 is over already;  it just zoomed past.. didn’t it? I was reading Amu’s year end post recently and Since it’s been ages that I put up anything on this little place of mine, this is the perfect time to break the prolonged absence  and what better than a year-end post.. So, without any further ado, here’s the report card for 2014..

-          The year started with preparation of my sister Chinki’s wedding. She got married to her college sweetheart Vishal in March – it was the usual big fat Indian ‘marwaari’ wedding with loads of dancing, music, bright clothes & jewelries, lots of traditional wedding rituals, delectable food and what not. This time the Sangeet was even more fun as apart from my usual solo number (hehehehe), I & M did a dance together as well.. on the song ‘billo rani’.. ;-).... it was good and considering M and I got just 1 day to prepare for it, I think we rocked! Both she & Vishal are great together and I am sure they will have a beautiful life!

-          2014 also marked the beginning of Shaurya’s school days. He started Playgroup in Jan and moved to Nursery in June. He likes school and he is learning many new things each day; many that we also don’t know. I remember the statement made by his Pre-School Principal during the Induction Program – ‘Kids are like sponge at this age so our effort should be to provide as much information to them as we can; we are not expecting the kids to remember anything or learn everything but just that they are exposed to new and varied things.  This will aid in more neural connections to form and help in overall development’.  I am very impressed with the way his pre-school teachers handle the class as well as the curriculum and it reflects in the kind of things Shaurya is aware of. I remember once they were being told about inventors and their inventions and Shaurya would come home and tell us about the different inventors like Edison, Graham Bell, etc; One day when he was watching Dinosaur Train, he told that Robert Fulton made Submarine which was showing on TV. Of course, we had never heard about Robert Fulton so we were not sure what he was talking about :-D.. We were not sure if he even got the name right .. so we googled on who was the inventor of Submarine. We did not get any name similar to Robert Fulton or Robert anything. So next we thought of googling with the name directly; and we found that Robert Fulton indeed built the first working Submarine ‘Nautilus’.  It’s rightly said that you also learn many new things along with your kid and both I & M are learning.

-          I changed my job! This has been the biggest change for me in 2014. I had joined my previous company straight out of Campus and have been working there for last 10 years. I had never thought that I would be leaving it ever.. My friends used to joke that I will retire from the board one day; one of my friend actually believes (and I am writing this with all the seriousness that he also means it with) I will be the CEO of that company one day.. (he was pretty disappointed that I left it.. ;-p ). Anyways lately I had come to realize that my company/job profile was not adding any value to me.. neither in terms of learning or experience or growth or compensation..  It was taking me for granted and maybe I was taking it for granted too.. It was time to ‘rock’ the boat a little and though I was not actively looking out, I got a call from a very good MNC. I cleared the interview (my first J) and got an offer I couldn’t refuse. And so I took the plunge. It’s been a month since I joined this new place.. so far so good.. I miss my friends in my previous company (but of course we are and we will be in touch.. ) and I also miss the familiarity of the old place, people and culture (this I will have to get used to.. ). But overall a long overdue change has been made; let’s see what the future holds!

-          M got promotion.. yeaaaaaaaa.. See how things play out.. I have been crying to get the designation of a manager (AM / PM whatever) behind my role but to no avail.. :-( and he got it just like that.. without even asking for it.. :-) So towards the end of the year, he got promoted to an AM position in his company. M is very clear headed and logical in all his dealings; I am sure he will be an excellent manager. Hmm… writing this just reminded me that his treat is still due..

-          I have blogged the most in 2014.. all thanks to the A-Z blogging challenge.. my run rate before and after that challenge has been pretty lousy.. ;-p But hey I did take up that challenge and completed it successfully.. an accomplishment which is even more commendable if you take my past record into consideration. It was fun and thanks to it, I was able to go past the 100^th post milestone.

-          I always wanted to create a small garden in my balcony. However I have never had a ‘green thumb’; on the contrary I think I have the most non-greenest of thumbs possible.. a good reason for that could be that I always wanted to have a good garden but never really tried my hands in gardening or actually growing anything yet. The little that I tried, I didn’t succeed. We have a few pots here in Pune but whenever we go out of station, the plants wilt due to lack of water and too much of sunshine / wind (our balcony faces the west and is on the 6^th floor). Anyways I thought of trying my hands at growing something so that Shaurya also learns a little about it. I took out the seeds of a ripe tomato and put it in a pot.. it was fun to watch it grow and especially after the first flowers came in, Shaurya got excited too. He even plucked the first ripe tomato.. :-) We got about half a dozen tomatoes.. they were small ones and I was pretty sad on learning that the plants flower once only. :-(  I guess I need to get proper seeds, compost and all to get big round tomatoes. Not a gardener yet but this little experiment has made me want to try some more. Let’s see if I am able to take this forward.

-          After delegating for about a year and rescheduling it once, I finally took my PMP exam and cleared it. With the amount of money involved in this certification, I was so damn relieved once the results were displayed. I hadn’t been able to study much.. with a little kid at home, a job change in between and my true-lazy self to deal with, I was really worried that I was not giving the examination the time and effort that it demands. Happy to say that from the last week of 2014, I am PMP-certified. Added it in my official signature as soon as it was done.. ;-p

-          The only dark patch in 2014 has been Papaji’s health. Around Aug last year, he started bending forward involuntarily from his stomach area. After visits to many hospitals in Orissa, Vizag & Pune, doctors were finally able to diagnose that it’s a neurological disorder called Dystonia – a disease which cannot be cured but only controlled. :-( A trip to Nimhans, Bangalore was also made but it turned out to be very futile- the strong medications there had severe side effect on Papaji. The Doctor here in Pune has stabilized the dose now and the side effects have thankfully all gone. Papaji is much better; though the bending still persists. Slowly and steadily Papaji is moving back to his former schedule. Medications continue and we hope that the bending reduces as time progresses. Hopefully 2015 will bring things to cheer and Papaji’s Dystonia will be under control.

-          This was also the year that I stayed alone in Pune when M was in Bangalore for 3 weeks with Papaji. Post our marriage, we were in different cities for about 3 months and later moved to Pune and created a base here. After that the only time that we had stayed separate was when I went home after my delivery. With an infant to tend to and also being at home, I was occupied though I did feel the distance. This time though I missed him way too much. With nuclear families even if one person is not there, you feel a huge emptiness. Both I and Shaurya missed M a lot. Those days, Shaurya would sleep early.. by 8-8.30pm. After Shaurya slept, there would be too much silence in the house. And if possible, I would miss M even more. On weekends, I used to take Shaurya out to Parks/Dinners and it felt different to eat out in restaurants with just the 2 of us. Though one good thing was Shaurya was a super goodie good boy during all that time – he would get up on time, have his meals properly, listen to us..

All in all 2014 was a good year. Among my friends and acquaintances, some got new jobs & some promotions,  some got married, some had their first kid & some second ;-), some bought new cars/home, etc. There were a few lean and a few darkish clouds and I just wish that they also go away in this new year or at least have a silver lining in each of them giving cause for some rocking celebrations in 2015.  

Happy New Year!

Homework Begins!

I didn't really expect it to start so soon but here they are, the first homework assignment for Shaurya has come. His Pre-School teachers mostly do reading, storytelling, games, puzzles, poems and other such activities. But now that he is in Nursery, they are starting on standing and sleeping lines as well. Proper writing activities are supposed to start post winter vacations so maybe it’s just the warm up.

Anyways Shaurya had fun doing this. Crayons and Paper – what more does a kid need. :-D After doing this, he wanted to do more; so I had to take out a rough notebook and make more patterns of standing and sleeping lines. He has filled up numerous pages already..  Just the beginning I guess.. lets hope this excitement continues as he grows up more and he gets some 'less interesting' homework.. ;-p

'Not having it all' versus 'Leaning In'

This Friday morning, as usual I was finishing up the morning chores and getting ready for office. When I was done, I had a few minutes to spare before going out to catch my office bus. I decided to start reading the newspaper (I read it in the bus. :-D) and my eyes caught the article from a recent interview of Indra Nooyi, the PepsiCo CEO. As I have always admired her, I was very much interested in the article. To add to the appeal, it was about her motherhood experiences. However I didn't really know what to make of the article; it kind of started me thinking. My first reaction was that of sadness - looks like the feeling of 'guilt' that working Moms have is universal and even an extraordinary amount of success doesn't wash it away completely. On further thoughts, I felt a kinship with her - So I am not the only one who has this 'guilt' bout on occasions. The article was on my mind the entire day (and even this weekend for that matter). I discussed this with M and even with my colleagues - few of them are on the same boat as me!

Since the Facebook COO, Sheryl Sandberg was in India recently and had addressed Indian women (mainly professionals) on her now famous philosophy aka book - 'Lean In', there was bound to be comparisons. In the Indian print media, both these differing thoughts created quite a buzz and whole lot of debates started. As a result, some really good articles came out focusing on motherhood and career. However in many of the comparative discussions, people out-rightly rejected what Indra Nooyi said.  I don’t really understand the thought process career women have when they say that Indra is not making sense at all. Am I the only one who thinks that maybe she isn’t talking all that nonsense? Let’s see what she has said.

Per Mrs Nooyi, “the biological clock and the career clock are in total conflict with one another”– She is so right! Your late 20’s/early 30’s is the time when you are rising up on the chain and breaking towards the managerial position in your workplace. It is also the time by when you need to ‘settle’ in your personal life.. and the settlement here includes kids as well. Many decide to have kids and this puts a delay in your moving up the ladder. Though in recent times, we see many exceptions to this. Some women focus more on their career, some more on their family and some try to balance it out! But it all does suggest that we are making choices and trying to balance it all out.  We cannot always “lean in” and many a times knowingly lean out. I agree with the Facebook COO that we sometimes lean out even before its needed and we need not kill our ambition just because we have a family to take care of. A fine balance between both the extremes is needed.

Women “cannot have it all" – Of course we cannot. No one can for that matter. We need to define what all needs to be included in this ‘all’ of ours.  A cost benefit analysis is always part of our decision making and planning process. You sometimes do not take a task in office voluntarily since it would mean more time away from your kid. As you leave for home early, your boss gives a critical and visible assignment to someone else.  There are N such scenarios. I can leave Shaurya and go to my office based on the plan that M will leave late for office and I will reach home early. With 2.5 hours of afternoon time in school and around 1 to 1.5 hours gone in nap, we thought this is doable. We miss out on a few things but that is our choice. Everyone makes similar plans and modifies his/her life around the kids with their best and in turn decide what ‘all’ is needed!

About the ”guilt” statement, I don’t think she is so wrong. I have had the same guilty feelings so many times. It is not like I am wallowing in guilt and self-pity but there have been many doubts. I worry, if my leaving him at home, will have a long term not-so-good impact on his attitude or personality. Since I come from a family where women have always been homemakers, this has been a difficult decision to make. But I have referred to many of friend’s and their mom’s experience and having a working mom doesn't seem to spoil a kid. I have my hopes set on the same and believe that Quality time matters more than Quantity. But then again the doubts resurface when I hear or read of a bad experience! And it’s not just one kind of guilt that women have – feeling guilty when you have to leave your child and go to office, there are also cases when women feel guilty for leaving their job for the kids!  I am sure men or shall I say fathers do not feel any such guilt since the role definition for them is clear, they are the providers (even in their mind). It’s we the nurturers who have all the doubts.. :-( ;-).

Since we cannot really have it all, we have to make choices and decide on the important ‘alls’ we want and then go for it. And the support of our spouse and family on this is a must have! We need to work together on all the decisions that are made. In the end, the important thing is to have peace with your decision.. I think it will ultimately remove all the guilt and associated feelings. As M said, Satisfaction will make you realize that you indeed ‘have it all’ !

Coffee, Starbucks and me

Just came back from the CCD (Cafe Coffee Day) outlet which has opened near our apartment. While Shaurya and M enjoyed chocolate doughnut and Kiwi Lemonade, I sipped into an excellent Cappuccino - the simple classic one. Whenever I have coffee in such cafes, I always remember the time I used to hate their coffees. 

Since young, I had always associated 'Coffee' with the delectable milky and 'relatively' strong Nescafe one that my mom used to prepare at home. We used to love them as it was always made late at night during rainy season! Since my father is a businessmen, he usually works late into the night tallying the finances and other work. On regular days, he (and we kids) used to drink milk. However when it used to be rainy and chilly nights, Papa often used to ask Mummy to prepare coffee. Obviously we used to ask for the same too! Mummy would prepare the coffee and all of us used to be sitting curled up on the bed enjoying the coffee in those cold rainy nights! It used to be awesome. As a result, I always associate coffee with rain :-)

One of the first time I had the cappuccino and espresso types was when I started working in Bangalore. I still remember how much I hated it. I found it very bitter; my mom used to prepare s little sweeter versions and though they were strong, they were not as strong as the ones made by cafe shops with freshly ground beans. Hence at the start, I used to avoid them. I developed the taste for these type of coffee only when I went to US. Few of my colleagues in office used to drink regular cappuccinos/espressos and even dark ones (no sugar-no milk/cream). I tried my first dark coffee on the flight to US. ( I just took a sip and threw the remaining :-D) 

Anyways I had my first Starbucks coffee there. I can't really remember what I liked about it, but for some reason I enjoyed it thoroughly! Maybe all that choices that they give you when you enter into a Starbucks just impressed the hell out of me :-D. From then on, I used to have it regularly so much so that a Latte and Cinnamon Bagel was my regular breakfast there (I know not very healthy but then I have never been a healthy eater.. something I hope to change gradually now). Even my last breakfast before returning back to India was a Starbucks Latte and Croissant. Once back in Bangalore, I used to miss Starbucks a lot (It wasn't there in India at that time); however I started liking the ones available in Barista and CCD outlets in Bangalore. Looks like they weren't so bad after all!  

Now we have Starbucks in India too and I get to enjoy it with M. You see apart from the lovely childhood memory associated with Coffee, I also have fond memories (and countless future memories to be made) of enjoying it with M. One of the first and best ones I have is during our courtship days, when M used to fly to Bangalore often (from Baroda where he was working at that time) to see me. One night, it was raining (as usual) and we were back in my apartment after watching a movie; M was dilly-dallying so that he could delay going back to his friends place & spend some more time with me ;-). To help him, I made some coffee and we enjoyed some beautiful moments together sipping the coffee and watching the rains on the terrace.

So Coffee time for me is always a small celebration kind of time.. whether with friends or family! Some people even have life changing events or memories associated with it as is the real life story of Michael Gates Gill in 'How Starbucks saved my life'. (Yup I have even read a book with Starbucks on its cover.. though Amu is to blame for it, she is the one who suggested it.. :-). It's a decent read.). I haven't had such profound experiences yet.. just enjoying my regular cuppa now!

The only constant thing

It's said that 'change' is the only constant thing. And after resisting for many years, I have finally changed the template design for my blog. (which you would have already noticed if you are here :-D)

The new design templates available at e-blogger have loads of feature which the classic design did not support. However I being 1). the lazy one, 2). not changing something which is working fine and 3) not liking too many changes, I kept it as is though many a times I thought of changing it. On some occasions I did try some new templates as well, but I could not find the existing fonts and colours that my blog had in the new ones and hence reverted to the old one again.

Recently Amu suggested if I could have the list type drop down in my blog which will help readers to easily navigate to older posts. In the old design, just a few of the recent posts used to come in the main page. To go to older ones, readers had to make quite a herculean effort. This made me take the final step and go ahead with the make over. 

So here it is.. the new look.. :-) I have tried to keep as many things as the old one as I could.. but then again.. change is good! Hope you like it.

PS: I wrote this post about 10 days back - the day I actually changed the template. So it's late but then better late than never.. ;-p

Z - Zeitgeist

I heard about this for the first time from my friend Ashwani. He had seen this documentary and while we were talking one day, he told me about it. It was before either of us were married or had become parents and at that time we used to watch a lot of movie and suggest good and interesting ones to each other. On further googling, I learnt that Zeitgeist is a German word which means "the defining spirit or mood of a particular period of history as shown by the ideas and beliefs of the time" - quite a heavy word indeed. Anyways I got my hand on the DVD and watched it. 

The documentary is actually based on conspiracy theories and focuses on issues of Christianity, 9/11 twin tower attack and how big banks are trying to control the world. (Conspiracy Theory reminds me of the awesome Mel Gibson- Julia Roberts movie where Mel's character has a lot of conspiracy theories of his own.. Being a fan of both Mel and Julia, I had loved the movie. They look awesome together and though I have heard the movie didn't get much critical acclaim, I am totally positively biased towards it.. I think everyone should watch this movie.. multiple times!! :-) )

The documentary, though certainly not in the lines of Fahrenheit 9/11, is a decent watch. The things shown in the documentary looked too far fetched to be true. It looked like facts and opinions have been mixed together to make a khichdi. On Christianity, anyways there are lot of theories on how Jesus might be just a story or how he has decedents living among us (Da vinci code). Faith in God is something very personal and regarding belief in Him, it doesn't really matter what everyone thinks! About the 9/11 attacks too, I am not really convinced that govt would be involved or at least not do anything to stop it. But then again, politics, money and power is something which makes people do unbelievable stuff. Nothing is above reproach here. The big banks controlling and manipulating everyone for their benefit is quite conceivable. Overall the documentary was an interesting and different one time watch. 

And with this, I finish off my A-Z blogging challenge!!! Yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!! :-D
Here I go now..